The Athletic Reporter
September 12, 2005 Sports News the Way You Want It. Completely Made Up. Issue 127
Barry Bonds To Return; Pedro Gomez Taken Out of Cryogenic Storage

Above: a cryogenically frozen Pedro Gomez of ESPN awaits the return of San Francisco's Barry Bonds (inset)
SAN FRANCISCO - With All-Star slugger Barry Bonds slated to return to the San Francisco Giants lineup this week, ESPN has announced that it has released reporter Pedro Gomez from the cryogenic storage tank he was placed in when it became evident that Bonds would miss most, of not all, of the 2005 season due to knee injuries. Gomez extensively covered Bonds' every move for ESPN during spring training.

"We are pleased to announce that Pedro Gomez is thawing nicely," said ESPN VP of Talent Al Jaffe, "and he should be ready to resume his round-the-clock focus on Barry Bonds the minute Bonds starts playing again."

Bonds, who has undergone three operations on his right knee since January 31, needs 53 more home runs to break Hank Aaron's hallowed career home run record of 755.

"I just looking forward to getting back out there, and I'm not really worried about all that other stuff," Bonds said. "And obviously, it's nice that Pedro Gomez's wife and kids are going to be able to eat and buy clothes again and stuff."

Gomez's first on-camera, post-cryogenic-freezing report came Sunday night during ESPN's 11:30 pm "SportsCenter."

"Cold," Gomez told anchors Stuart Scott and Neil Everett. "So cold."

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