The Athletic Reporter
September 12, 2005 Sports News the Way You Want It. Completely Made Up. Issue 127
Presidential Election To Be Decided Using BCS Format
Originally posted 10/25/2004

President George W. Bush (left) and challenger John Kerry react to news that the election will be decided according to the BCS formula
WASHINGTON, DC - The United States Congress announced this week that due to increasing concerns about voter fraud and potential lawsuits surrounding the November 2 presidential election, the next president will be chosen using college football's BCS format. "[NCAA president] Myles Brand assured us that the BCS is the best possible system for accurately choosing the correct winner," said House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R, IL).

"The electoral college," said Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry, "set forth by our founding fathers, is every bit as outdated as many other things they did, like traveling by horse and buggy or fighting bad guys. The BCS system is the one that will ensure that the election is decided fairly."

The old electoral college system, in which each candidate received votes from designated electors who cast their ballots based on the results of the popular vote in their individual states, will be replaced by a system in which the popular vote counts for one third, the USA Today/ESPN coaches poll counts for one third, and the final third is made up of an average of each candidates' computer ranking.

Not everyone in Washington is enthusiastic about the change. President George W. Bush weighed in on the new system over the weekend, asking, "can't we just have my brother pick who wins, like last time?"

"We think this will settle any controversy," Rep. Hastert said. "It's certainly worked for the NCAA."

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