The Athletic Reporter
September 12, 2005 Sports News the Way You Want It. Completely Made Up. Issue 127
Good Basketball Hogged
Originally posted 4/12/2004

Tyler Hennessey and Chase Foley, seen here hogging the good basketball
CLEARWATER, FL - Sources close to the fifth grade gym class at Webster Elementary School in Clearwater, Florida reported this week that popular kids Tyler Hennessey and Chase Foley, both 11, kept on hogging the good basketball during free gym play even after being asked repeatedly to share it by fitness instructor Kathy Montoya. "Those guys always hog the good basketball," said classmate Wayne Pauling, 10. "We never get to play with it."

The "good basketball" -- one of two Wilson NCAA Junior Synthetic Indoor/Outdoor models purchased by the school district last September; the other has since been lost -- has, according to Pauling and several other members of Mrs. Lowe's fifth grade class, been hogged on several occasions by Hennessey and Foley despite appeals to Montoya to get them to stop.

"They always lie and stuff," said fifth grader Joey Redding, "like, one time, Tyler said that if we let him and Chase use the good basketball to play one-on-one with for a whole week that he'd let us come over to his house and play MarioKart, but then he never did. Then one time Chase said he'd buy us all a Mountain Dew at lunch but we never got any Mountain Dew."

"Those two know they're not supposed to hog the good basketball," said Montoya. "There's just so many kids in here during free gym play that I can't keep my eye on everything that's going on. If they keep it up, though, I might have to give each of them a warning."

Montoya added that she hoped it didn't come to that, as two warnings equals one demerit.

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