The Athletic Reporter
September 12, 2005 Sports News the Way You Want It. Completely Made Up. Issue 127
Vijay Singh Marries Swedish Blonde Way Hotter Than Tiger's Fiancee
Originally posted 2/23/2004

Vijay Singh with his new bride on the beach in his native Fiji
LAUTOKA, FIJI - Golfer Vijay Singh stepped up his rivalry with top-ranked Tiger Woods this week, marrying a Swedish blonde who's even hotter than Woods' fiancee, Elin Nordegren. Singh, who recently completed a streak of 12 consecutive tournaments with a top 10 finish -- something Tiger has never accomplished -- wed Helke Tornqvist, 21, in his native Fiji this week.

"This really brings Vijay right onto Tiger's heels," said The Golf Channel's Vince Cellini. "For a long time now, people have been wondering if anybody could come up and compete with Tiger. Now, it looks like Vijay might be the guy. Anybody who's been paying attention lately would have to say that Vijay's been playing at least as well as Tiger. And have you seen Helke? Wow. I mean, wow."

In addition to the hot blonde Swedish wife and the top 10 streak, Singh finished at number one on the PGA Tour's money list in 2003, breaking Woods' four-year stranglehold on the top spot. Woods, however, won more tournaments that Singh did in 2003 and was named PGA Tour Player of the Year for the fifth consecutive time.

"I think a little healthy competition is great," Woods said. "Vijay and Helke, if they're happy together, that's wonderful for them. I happen to think that Elin is a knockout. Sure, her legs aren't as long as Helke's, her breasts might not be as large, and from what I've heard she's decidedly less... adventurous. But Elin's great. I wouldn't trade her for Helke, even if Vijay called me up on my cell phone, that I usually have on me and almost always answer right away, and asked if I wanted to for like a week or two. And I wouldn't trade my game for Vijay's, as great as he's played lately."

News of Singh's marriage came as a surprise to many PGA Tour players, most of whom were not even aware that he had split up with Ardena. Singh himself offered no comment, to the surprise of absolutely no one.

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