The Athletic Reporter
September 12, 2005 Sports News the Way You Want It. Completely Made Up. Issue 127
 
New WWE Wrestler "Monkeypox" Debuts
Originally posted 6/16/2003

New WWE wrestler "Monkeypox"
HOUSTON - Fans watching the WWE's "Bad Blood" pay-per-view this Sunday were treated to the debut of a new character, Monkeypox. The 6'4", 285-pound wrestler interrupted the "Hell in a Cell" match between World Heavyweight Champion Triple H and opponent Kevin Nash, tossing Nash against the chain-link fence of the steel cage and pinning Triple H to win the belt.

"We've had a long history of heel [bad guy] characters that have been based on current events," said WWE owner Vince McMahon. "One of our best tag teams from the '80s were Nikolai Volkoff and the Iron Sheik, who were from the USSR and Iran, respectively. People hated them. Now, we've got La Resistance, a tag team from France that taunts American crowds. We figured that we'd continue that tradition by adding Monkeypox to our lineup of WWE superstars, since it seems like everybody's afraid of monkeypox."

Monkeypox won the World Title by administering his patented finishing move, "The Vaccination," to Triple H after clearing the ring amid a chorus of boos from the crowd at Houston's Compaq Center. "No one is safe from Monkeypox!," he screamed into a microphone after the match.

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